Students learn of life outside classroom

Contact: Rob Hedelt is a staff writer with The Fredericksburg Free Lance-Star.
Phone: 540-374-5415

The Fredericksburg Free Lance-Star
Reprinted from The Fredericksburg Free Lance-Star

Tappahannock (May 17, 2005) - New program of character and life skills having an impact at St. Margaret’s School

THE SPEAKER in the crowded room was pulling no punches, telling the sometimes grinning, sometimes grimacing students of St. Margaret’s School in Tappahannock what many knew, but few had heard in such stark terms:

Girls are often mean and vindictive.

They form cliques, often just to exclude others.

And they can do and say the nastiest things to other girls, sometimes just over the clothes they wear.

When speaker Shanterra McBride of “The Empower Program” was done, junior Brooke Shafer said the session at the private girls school in Essex County helped her rethink the way she relates to other students.

“I think hearing something like this makes you think and be honest about how you treat others,” she said, noting that it was easy in a school full of girls to neglect some, even if not intentionally.

Making students think about their lives outside the classroom is just what the school’s relatively new character and life skills program is all about.

Dorm mural - Boarding students live and learn in dorm communities.  They created murals during a Residential Meeting to express their group's identity. Dubbed the Co-Curriculum, the plan now in its second year picks up where academic instruction leaves off, covering topics as diverse as healthy dating, wellness, eating disorders, teen pregnancy, domestic abuse, body image, teen depression, self-defense, and personal goals.

And, for a school where the boarding students are together 24/7, a focus on things like peer relationships, conflict mediation and role-model development.

Officials at the school noted that many of these topics are things parents might discuss with their children at home.

But because St. Margaret’s is home to many of its students for long stretches each year, the school feels responsibility to help cover the topics in order to fulfill its overall mission: “Educating young women for life.”

The program, which tailors topics to lessons appropriate for each grade level, has gotten the school national notice.

That came first in a featured presentation at The Association of Boarding Schools’ annual conference in December, and most recently, in a Jan. 5 column in Education Week, the national newspaper of record for primary and secondary education.

George McDowell, dean of faculty at the school, said a diverse group of faculty and other specialists at St. Margaret’s sat down a few years back to see just what information was already being conveyed, and what needed to be added.

The group identified five topics that needed covering: emotional balance and well-being, decision-making, service, identity and relationships.

McDowell said that the group, working with a knowledge of resources available at the school and in the community, came up with a plan to introduce the topics in “town meetings,” smaller dorm gatherings, informal discussions between girls and at a range of special events ranging from health days to informal lunchtime chats.

Students have heard a young woman talk about the realities of teen pregnancy, an expert describe the warning signs of teen depression and another authority outline the warning signs of potential abuse in a dating relationship.

The Empower Program got students' attention with straight talk at a Town Meeting about how girls sometimes treat each other. Other items less controversial but equally important: how to eat healthy, plan and pursue life goals, deal with stress and manage personal finances.

Clinical Adviser Mary Williams said the faculty and experts work with the students to help the students deal with the information they receive.

She said that while students may not take each session to heart immediately, it provides information and a perspective they may find helpful when a problem arises, either for them or a classmate.

Why is the program happening now?

“Years ago, I believe that teachers and those involved in dormitory life probably did deal with many of these issues, often in informal discussions around the dinner table, when there was time to linger and talk,” said Cathy Sgroi, assistant head for school life.

Today, she said, more demanding academic programs make for busy days, with less time for discussions like that to happen.

Students have reacted positively to the offerings.

Eileen Tsai, a junior at the school, said units on personal development had pushed her to be more outgoing, trying to connect with students and teachers she might once have been too shy to reach.

And Jennifer Clark, a senior, said sessions like the one on teen pregnancy helped students see real-world consequences for situations like that.

ROB HEDELT is a staff writer with The Free Lance-Star. Contact him at 540-374-5415, or rhedelt@freelancestar.com